如何变的自信却不自大

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如何变的自信却不自大

pleaser. You are someone that doesn’t know how to speak your mind. You are someone that is afraid that your opinion isn’t important. You let people treat you however they want and don’t give them consequences for their actions.

                               
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你是一个要取悦别人的人。你是一个不知道如何表达自己的人。你是一个害怕自己的观点不够有分量的人。你让别人按照他们自己想要的方式去对待你，过后他们却不用为自己的行为负责。

This is the exact same way that I felt six years ago. I couldn’t overcome the debilitating fear that I wasn’t worth anything. I had no confidence. Over the years I did develop confidence and a realistic view of what I am capable of, but I didn’t want to go the opposite way – becoming cocky and full of myself instead of being “sure” of myself.

这就是我六年前的感觉。当时，我不能克服“我没有存在价值”这种想法带来的恐惧，我没有自信。一路走来，我增强了自信心，并且清楚地知道了我的能力范围，但是我不想往相反的方向走——变的自大，眼中只有自己而不是相信自己。

Here is how you can become confident without becoming cocky. Know your strengths

以下是教你如何变的自己却不自大的方法。了解你自己的能力

This is the exact thing I didn’t know that led me to believe that I wasn’t worth anything. It’s important to be able to identify what you are good at in your life, if only to choose that something as the thing that you devote your time to. When you find your strengths you can accomplish things in your life with much more confidence.

以前正是因为我不了解自己的能力，我才认为自己没有存在价值。如果你要选择把时间花在什么事情上，意识到你擅长什么是十分重要的。当你了解自己的能力之后，你能带着更多的自信去完成你生命中的一些事情。

There are a few good ways to find your strengths. A simple way would be to find the things that you like to do and the things that make you feel “strong”; that is, find the tasks and actions you do on a regular basis that make you feel good about yourself. These tend to be your strengths. More importantly, know your limitations

这里有些好方法帮助你了解自己的能力。一个简单的方法就是找到你喜欢做的事情和能让你感到精力充沛的事情。也就是说，找到一些你按照一定的规律去做，而且能让你自我感觉良好的事情。这些有可能就是你的能力。但更重要的是，要清楚你自己的底线。

While knowing your strengths is important, to make sure that you are only confident and not cocky, you have to know what your limitations are.

了解自己的能力是重要的，但为了确保你是自信的而不是自大的，你必须要知道你的底线是什么。

If you scoff at the notion that you have any limitations, you need more than ever to realize that you do. Everyone sucks as something. In fact, everyone sucks at most things. The thing is that we need to know which ones they are to avoid the “Superman Syndrome” or the idea that everything you do or can do you are instantly good at. Get a crew

如果你嘲笑你有底线的想法时，你更加需要意识到你确实是。所有人都不能做好一些特定的事情。事实上，所有人都不能做好大多数事情。我们需要知道他们在什么事情上会避免“超人综合征”，或者任何你做过的事或你能做的事的想法。找到一个合适的朋友

Nothing is better than having people around that can keep you accountable and can speak up when you are becoming too full of yourself. Having people that are honest and not afraid to show you the reality of any situation are some of the best people to have as friends and confidants.

没有比有能在你太自大的时候提醒你，让你保持清醒的朋友更好的了。那些诚实，而且能在任何情况下都不害怕告诉你真相的人是最适合做朋友和知己的人之一了。

Having others around that only support you and lift you up and don’t show you where you are misstepping is certainly a good way to become cocky. I’m not saying to have people around you that make you feel like crap; you need people around you that are